Home :: The Continuing Conversations of “Velvet Revolver”.

knock, knock

opens the door

Hi, Sam….oh, you brought company!!!

Welcome guys, make yourselfs comfortable…i’m gonna take Slash for a tour here but it will take a while, since i don’t know exactly where i am…don’t wait for us…:twisted:

grabs Slash


17 thoughts on “The Continuing Conversations of “Velvet Revolver”.

  1. MATT: You like Hello Kitty too? Ain’t she the greatest? to the others See? Told you it was okay for men to like little pink cutesy cartoon cats. Hello Kitty is the best! Whee!

    XMAS DECORATIONS begin to shake some more and slowly transforms into a human shape. First two booted legs appear, then a jewelled torso, finally the spectacularly dishevelled top.

    RUSSELL BRAND THE XMAS TREE: Festive greetings to you all!

    SLASH: Ohhhkay… did everybody else see that?

    EVERYBODY: Um, yeah.

    SLASH: Right…

    Don’t worry, Slash. All sorts of weird stuff happens in this imaginary netherworld.

    SLASH: So I see.

    Though we can’t take responsibility if the Smurfs show up.

    SLASH: They weren’t smurfs! They were little blue predator type guys. And, please, keep them out of this.

    No problem.

    RUSSELL BRAND THE XMAS TREE: Slash! How are you, me old mucker?

    [image:2835 size=small]
    Sam Randall
    Ain’t Life Grand?

  2. SLASH: Dude…what the hell did you do to the tree??

    MATT: Duh, I decorated it.


    MATT:…What? Did I use too much glitter?

    Imagine that Barbie and My Little Pony got together, had a night out and threw up all over the tree. And that said tree had been previously decorated by Mika and Kello Kitty. You’re about halfway there

    SLASH: Ya think?

    TREE DECORATIONS: hehehehehe… (begins to move!)


  3. On the one hand, OMFG MOVING CHRISTMAS TREE. But on the other, OMFG RUSSELL BRAND, what to do, what to do….

    RB THE XMAS TREE: Oooh, I remember you…. leers

    O.O Eeeeek…..

    DUFF (coming in from the kitchen): All right, the bread and eggnog are rea….wh-what? What the f\k?! Who let Matt decorate the tree?

  4. Over in the virtual home of the imaginary VR, the boys have found something…

    MATT – An abandoned package! Eek! Call the authorities! Seal the area!

    DAVE – You’ve been reading too many papers. Throws Matt’s copy of Weekly World News on the fire where the remnants of Russell Brand The Xmas Tree crackles suggestively

    SLASH – This thing’s come from Nigeria.

    MATT – Open it! It might have hundreds of millions of dollars in it!

    DAVE – You’ve been reading too many spam mails. Picks up Matt’s laptop.

    MATT – Hey!

    Slash opens the case

    SLASH – Heh, guess who this belongs to… Disney DVDs… a blank CD labelled “Top Gear Presenters Talk Dirty”, a scratched copy of The Song Remains The Same… and… wow… check this out… is she writing a book?

    DUFF – No man, that’ll be her dissertation. Let me see that.

    goes away for some time

    DUFF – Good work LadyMercury. I’ve made a few annotations you might wanna check out though.

    [image:2835 size=small]
    Sam Randall
    Ain’t Life Grand?

  5. Thank you… (blush blush)

    And Sam…THOSE ARE THE THINGS IN MY SUITCASE TO A TEE. Except for the Top Gear one, though I wish I had it

    RUSSELL BRAND: Wouldn’t you rather have a CD of ME talking dirty? (winks in a charred way)

    Er…no. You did it enough in your book. I love you still, but….no.

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